Friday, December 4, 2009

Do Blondes Have More Fun?

After years of having the same hair do I finally decided enough was enough and made an appointment with my number one girl Jess to get my hair did. For weeks I anticipated the date and pondered different cuts and styles. I stared at everyone and scrutinized their style and color and tried to picture it on my head. I even downloaded a picture of myself on one of those websites where you can try on virtual hair.

The style was pretty easy to nail down: something sort of short but not too short. Trendy but not quite the same as everyone else. The color was even easier. I just asked my husband what he wanted me to be. Now, before I continue, it's only fair to tell you that I have had many different hair colors in my life time including purple. The box said "Tropical Burgundy" but on my head it was purple and matching purple hair with work outfits for two months while it fades out is not an easy chore.

That being said, once your hair has been purple, you pretty much become fearless in the color department. After all, it's just hair. It will grow back. And if not, well, take your pick of some pretty awesome wigs.

So when I left the fate of my color up to my husband it did not come as a shock when he said BLONDE!! And yes, he said it in capital letters with exclamation points at the end. I said ok and before I left for the salon he reminded me not to chicken out and get "other colors put in it too" which in man language means "no highlights or lowlights, just be blonde."

And that is the message that I relayed to Jess when she asked what she could do for me. So she set about mixing her magic potion that was to turn me beautiful. And what fun we had! We had a great time watching my hair turn from reddish brown to Draco Malfoy white. The cut was fun too since I went from mid shoulder blade length hair to up above my collar. The classic wedge/bob with longer pieces in the front. We were fearless. It was great.

I looked fantastic! My hair was as blonde as blonde could be and it was styled beautifully. I wanted to take a picture for all of prosperity but couldn't find my camera. And what a shame too because as all women know, the first day of a hair cut and style has a Cinderella curfew. It looks fab until you go beddy bye. And then the evil trolls climb out from under the bed and do unspeakable things to your hair while you sleep and it never looks the same.

So when I woke up in the morning and the spell had been broken, I looked in the mirror (forgetting what we had done the day before) and almost screamed. There looking back at me was a crazy bedraggled homeless lady with bleach blonde hair. Or she may have been a strung out hooker the day after a bender. I'm not sure which but I stifled a scream of horror. Then I realized it was just me and felt much better for a second. Then I felt much worse. Because I realized that I can never again just put in a pony tail and leave the house. This hair will require styling every single day. And then I had a revelation. With an empty cigar box and a dirty coat I could go sit outside the Dollar General and panhandle. Cha-Ching! This hair style had the potential to pay for itself! And at the end of the day I can go home, style my hair and take my hubby out to eat with his hot blonde wife. No one would ever know it was the same person. What a difference a curling iron & some hair spray makes.

Now that I'm used to my hair I've been enjoying the reaction of others when they see my freakishly blonde hair for the first time. Some look mortified and ask if I did it myself. Others are duly impressed. Some just stare at me. Because of all the colors I've had in my life, including the purple, I have never been this light before. And I like it. I'll probably keep it this way until next summer when we open the pool. And the chlorine turns it green. Bah, green doesn't scare me.

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